Client Guide
Escort Guide
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Top Signs of a Bad Client
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You arrive as he's counting out the fee on the top of the dresser from his
coin jar; "...$13.35, $13.50, $13.60, $13.65...."
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You arrive as he's cleaning up for the date - starting from the bottom up,
currently @ picking toe-jams.
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You arrive as he's practicing 'fast-draws' with his pistol in front of a
mirror.
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He asks "Ya' wanna go get drunk first and chase women?"
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He phones for in-call directions, says "Speak slow, my mom's got arthritis
& can't write fast. She's gonna drive me, soon as Sis gets the car
home".
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Appears on bad-client list as #1. (with stars)
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He starts conversation with "All the other women in this town are
worthless. Hope you ain't like them!"
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He starts conversation with "I'm BigDog, Trav'ler, (or whoever's known) and
you better be worth it or you'll never work in this town again."
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He starts conversation with "I'm WAY important, and I can do GREAT things
for your career.".
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He crawls to answer the door 'cuz he's too drunk to walk.
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Offers to "take you away from all this" ... (but keep it quiet, don't let
his wife find out...)
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His conversation has NO words in it with more than 4 letters (& most
end with "k").
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